Ok I'll be the first to admit that I am not a people person. I prefer to hang around my home and family. That being said, when I want to be social...I need to be social. My husband works on weekends so that is usually when I enjoy seeing friends, attending church, going to get togethers, and attending the infrequent parties that cross my path. However since A has been born I find these forays into the social world aggravating and draining. I am frustrated because I need to isolate myself to calm or feed her. And end up asking myself why the hell I came at all if I can't talk to others in a social setting for more than a few minutes. I am still trying to increase/maintain my milk supply for her so getting a babysitter or supplying a bottle over the weekend would be counter productive.
Today was difficult (and it is not even noon) because I tried to take her to church for the first time. She did not even make it through the Welcome. I have been feeling guilty for not going in 3 months (childcare was limited over the summer, and the nursery is not equipped to deal with immobile infants) and now I am thinking maybe I should just wait for another few months till she can sit up and be in the nursery.
I have my first Tarheel get together in a couple of weeks, and I am really starting to worry if I will be able to enjoy it at all with her along (I can't leave her home, the tarheels would kill me).
A coworker told me the other day that this time of a babys life can be trying with them seemingly attached to you 24/7, but that over all it is a very short time of their life. and while I "know" that to be true, it doesn't make the isolation any easier to bear.